cait collins

 

laalaaBIG ass pudding pie

i watch my skrawny hiney moreso in the midst of flea and tick season and that one time a few years ago a friend and i trailed some nearby woods and we wore khaki shorts color co-ordinated fruit of the loom tanktops coffee colored combat boots dented bicycle helmets black rubber framed shades and about a mile into the crusade i had to go really really bad and i found a bushy brushy area off the path pulled my shorts down below my knobby knees squatted p p'd poopie'd likethat but what i didn't realize is that i wiped my ass (& twat) with those damndable infectious ivy poison leaves we had jungle forest sex then retreated and days later everything down there wept and itched some gawd awful putrid pussstuff TAKE MY WORD FOR IT i scratched like a pasture full of stinky barnyard animals on a 110 degree day and and and my poor pud suddenly acquired the nightmares of all female nightmares - HORSE VAGINA SYNDROME even the doc pointed this fact out that brazen bastard but he likes my legs a lot - funny i never heard from my friend again...
...my heart goes out to people infected with std's...step_ _ _ _ _back.


 

**length**

i recently
came

a c  r   o    s     s

a pencil

dick

and
they ain't so
bad
after

aWE...

 

**what i like**

i
like
men

with
        ummmMmm

no___pants

 

**the basics of my last will and testimony**

dress me
in black spandex
skintight
like i like
including
that finger-sized
pokehole i poke
into the crotch
minus
fancy lacy pretty panties i
never wear
don't forget
a long sleeve black T
screaming some dumb ass’d saying
sprawled across the front like
i survived my family...
and if anybody turns me over
                                                       ...and now THIS...


rikki lake i am
no
royal loyal fan so
don’t disguise me as
one of those
makeover monsters
and don’t blow
dry my natural curls for
this rats nest has the talent to
expand farther and swell wider
than a marge simpson
socket circuit shock and
there’s only
so much head
room

a hundred million mass cards
will only keep the catholic church
out of the red and
i’ve fallen away as
long ago as they have plus
10 $ Hallmark cards and stinky flowers
shaped like sweethearts won’t
keep me out of heavens hell
YOU HEAR ME
so
in lieu of allthat just
make sure
i have the ace mix of
pornographic materials and paraphernalia like
the haitachi magic wand with the G spotter attachment but
don't flick that babeee on hiGH
o god
and
include
photographs of friends poets artists
the-hold.com contributors family
members
like me or not
bukowski books my books &
my selection of certain
peoples private parts breakfast
bars and
cover me with
souvenirs
of you

i want to mention to the
mortician's crew to
do
the job on the
spectators (fanclub) that
show
make them look
as good as
a person
inside a casket so
i can pop UP from
my repose and announce:
my devoted audience looks
very lifelike...
(for a change)

i don’t need a bagpipe parade or
Mass of Christian Burial
large event attractions targets terrorist
attacks these days so
keep it simple tho
what i do want is a 7 layer cake topped with
a 1st edition die cast Hot Wheels Hearst
(limited)
and
a sign bolted to the back reading
just buried

further
i hereby request
not to be hidden under
a shady buttonwood or
green sloping landscape but
near the maintenance shed so
my spot
is mowed
firsthand and
to my faithful followers
including jealous pissed-off people
active gay community
pink flamingos
fuzz who
pay their final respects
carve
with stone on stone
this is your last chance to jump
my bones thanx
for cumming...


cait collins - effective 05.28. 2002

 

**soaring**
Poet


5/21/2002
04:15:49
Subject: cait
IP: Logged

Message:

ahahahha ok
i am html
brain
dead
tables widths' ho
rizontal lines
RULE
bgcolor=" font size= link="# 8723 bits n
Bytes
"graphics/&"graphics/&"graphics/& more"
fuckin'graphics/
davedembinski.html
i use content="TRUE beaver robots meta names bad language
bartman
a hotdog
topmargin="0"
bottommargin cellpadding=0 cellspacing=
0BODY's
Djeeneeataol
read contributors chapbooks
TIMES NEW ROMAN--
YOU know the type
but
i gotta lot accomplished wiht
this hold 50 issues thing
this is HIGH PRODUCTION DRAMA&androla1.jpg
there are those great poets in the-hold.com
and
it's 4 a.m...
wet~~
ones~~
you'SE~
god dammitall i
just don't spend enough time with
this ezine...
zonk
xo c



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books reviews w/michael basinski
The Louisiana Review - summer/fall 2001 issue
thundersandwich
Impetus
Logic Alley
JunketW.omen's A.rt R.ecognition M.ovement
absolute arts
featured @ firestorm.com
art conspiracy


• cait collins • pob 5473 • deptford • nj • 08096
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